Absolutely Not Keeping Up with the Joneses

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When Sean and I got married, I couldn’t wait for a perfect little life. I was skinny, wore cute clothes, and had hopes and aspirations of success and making it like everyone else, like the Joneses. When I found out that I was pregnant with Jackson, I knew that I must get a large SUV. I thought that all moms drove big SUVs and white ones, for that matter. So, I bought a large, white SUV, and I hated it. I actually drove the SUV for 45 days, waited for Sean to go to school one night, and traded it in. To say Sean was surprised when he got home was an understatement.

I learned a valuable lesson. What seemed to be what everyone else wanted in life was not what I wanted. Now, with 11 and 12-year-old kids, I have reverted to an SUV. However, that is the ME of now, not the ME of then.

Heading Back to My Roots

Sean and I ended up selling our first house about nine months after Jackson was born because of its size. Our house was about 1,000 square feet. We contemplated moving to the new communities that were being built around us. However, my mom watched Jackson while Sean and I taught school, and we lived a good 30 minutes from her house. One day she called me on the phone and asked us if we would like to purchase my parent’s house. My mom said that they would move into a house that they owned and had been renting out for years.

My grandparents lived in between my parent’s house and their rental. I would be able to walk Jackson (and soon to be Lucy) to their house, or my mom could come and stay with the kids at my house. We took my parent’s offer and decided to move back to the home I grew up in (and my dad had grown up in before that). However, all of the dreams and aspirations of what I thought I wanted in my ideal home were finished. I was moving back to my childhood home, a 1950’s brick ranch.

A Great Life Lesson Learned

I didn’t understand that moving back home would force me to let my dreams of immaculate kitchens and huge en-suites go. However, we begin forming our identity as Brandi and Sean Green rather than Brandi and Sean Wanna-Be-Jones.

Even though it may have been by force, I learned that 1950’s pink bathrooms were fine for guests. Little improvements along the way to modernize could make a vast difference in updating our house. I embraced the paneled family room and learned to appreciate slightly outdated cabinets. What I really gained from this experience was that the money I was saving from not living like the Jones’ would lead to some amazing travel as Jackson and Lucy got older.  And since moving back into the house, 12 years later, I have only had one person make fun of my pink bathroom floors. It didn’t even seem to bother me when it happened.

I do know that my life is perfectly imperfect. Breaking the cycle of thinking that everyone must be the same or strive for dreams A, B, and C in life is out of my mindset. A funny aspect that I have also realized is that my true friends are not the Jones either. We are unique individuals who have no preconception that we need to live by a particular set of standards just because society says we should. And yes, you can have your interests or hobbies. However, they get to be yours because you love them and not because they are the current trends.

Somewhere along the way, my thyroid either died or took a permanent vacation. This transformed me from the skinny girl that Sean married to the nice and “fluffy” (as some of my 2^nd graders call me) person I am today. But, again, I am not conceding to being fluffy forever. I refuse to be discontent with my image because of what society or the media thinks I should look like. The Jones do not get to win here either!

Breaking the Cycle of the Joneses

The saying, “Keeping Up with the Joneses,” goes back to a comic strip from the 1910s. A family was struggling to keep up with their neighbors, the Jones. Isn’t that funny that the saying comes from a satirical comic strip? However, so many people have made it a life’s mission. I think the phrase “Do You” is completely overrated, but the reason why is that “Do You” holds so much truth.

Don’t be afraid to step away from what society thinks you need to be. I am not afraid to admit that I love $5 pajamas from Walmart or that my kids’ main source of clothing is Cat and Jack from Target. Embrace who your family truly is and truly wants to be. Society will either understand or not and, if not, leave it behind.

Have you recently broken away from the Joneses or aspire to do so? We would love to hear from you in the comment section below!

Are you interested in economic vacations? Check out our article on Cruising on a Budget. Wanting to travel but don’t think you can? Read Three Common Misconceptions of Traveling.